Once again I’m going off the rails and taking a break from talking fishing. Those of you that have read my articles from the very beginning know about my history as a kid. Growing up on the streets of Rosenburg, Texas, and Houston, made me a little tougher than most kids my age. I knew first-hand by the age of 8 what it was like to be footloose and fancy free running the streets ‘til all hours of the night, with zero guidance.
While my biological mother was more concerned with her modeling career and surviving the beatings she took at the hands of my stepdad, I was just trying to survive. I was the one sneaking into houses looking for a quick meal.
The one thing I always wondered — where was my real dad during all of this and why did I never get to meet him? Why was he never involved in my life?
Was this his choice to avoid contact with me or was there some kind of a mutual agreement between my mother and him that he was to never reach out to me for any reason?
These are questions that I’ll never get the answers to until the day I’m reunited with my dad and the loved ones who have crossed over to the other side. But as a father myself, I cannot imagine having a child in this world and not knowing who or where they were.
I’ve always heard that my athletic abilities came from my dad. I’ve heard stories from my older brother, Mike (we share the same mom and dad), on the kind of dad he was to him and how he supported him and his athletic career.
But the same questions continue to go through my head today, even at the age of 64. How was it that we never met? Why didn’t he reach out to me?
Every kid wants that relationship with their dad. A dad plays an important role in the development of a young boy growing into a man. He also provides a sense of security to all his children that no matter what, dad always has their back.
He provides advice and guidance for life’s troubled journey and teaches how to navigate those trials and tribulations. He’s the man who jerks a knot in your tail when you need correcting or get out of line. He’s the rock you look up to and hope to make proud one day. He’s the man you only hope you can be one day.
But for me, that connection was never made. The years went by with zero contact from the man that I only heard about from relatives. From what I’ve been able to learn over the years, he had a good side and a bad side.
I’ve been told that he enjoyed his Friday and Saturday nights at local taverns, but he also had wandering eyes for the ladies and traded one for another frequently. Guess this is why he and my mother divorced while she was pregnant with me. All total, he was married seven times (the legal limit in Texas) and once to the same lady, twice.
So, maybe those that knew him thought it was in my best interest NOT to have a relationship with him; that nothing good would come out of us having that father-son bond that a boy wants with his dad.
But looking back, he missed out on so much of my life’s great experiences. Things that a dad is supposed to be there for like a high school state championship, graduation, signing an athletic scholarship, getting married, being drafted by a Major League Baseball team and so much more! He missed out on so many of my life’s ups and downs — and three great grandkids.
Growing up, I had the best childhood a young boy could ever ask for while being raised by my aunt and uncle in an awesome small town in East Texas. My uncle, who I called Dad after being adopted, was a great provider and taught me about responsibility and hard work while growing up on a ranch. He assumed the role of a loving father as best he could, but it’s just not the same.
There’s something about having a relationship with the man you share the same DNA with as it completes the internal connection — the connection that only a father can have with his children.
So, I know the day will come when I’ll get all my questions answered. I’ll finally get to meet the father I never met. But in the meantime, I’ll do my best to be the best father I can be to all three of my children.
For the latest local news, subscribe FOR FREE to the Lincoln Parish Journal and receive an email each weekday morning at 6:55 right to your inbox. Just CLICK HERE to sign up.
