By Brandon Ramsey
My mom only told me one lie when I was growing up, that I know of. It is one of the most wide spread lies in the world. If I were a betting man, I would even bet that your saint of a mother told you the same old tale. I would be willing to stake my salary on the fact that she told you:
“Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words will never hurt you.”
Most of you are now nodding your head in agreement with me. We have all been force fed that line our whole lives. It is so far from the truth it isn’t even funny. There have been many times in my life that I would have gladly taken a stick across the back of the head instead of the words that someone was spewing my way.
Words can be one of the most destructive forces known to man. They can start wars, cause divorces (sometimes seen as the same thing), or cause someone to take their own life. There are not many things that have that kind of power. But how does it get its power. Unfortunately the answer is “us.” The only way words get power is by our reaction to them.
Ed Young Jr., pastor of Fellowship Church in Dallas, once made a very inspired statement in his series “The Real F-word” about people who use words to hurt others. He said, “Most of the time when you are stewing and hurting over a statement someone made, you are the only one feeling that way. The person who made that statement has moved on and probably does not remember that they made it. Or at least won’t admit to you that they remember.”
I find this to be very true in my counseling office. If you think about an argument that you have had recently with your spouse, family member, or friend about hurt feelings, you will probably agree with me. How many times have you heard those famous words, “I don’t remember saying that,” only to be devastated because it has kept you awake for a week thinking about it?
This is a huge problem currently in our society and definitely in our schools, but it is not just a recent phenomenon. Check out 2 Cor. 6:8 or Acts 13:45. It was also an epidemic two thousand years ago.
Many people let the faulty beliefs of others cloud our perception of ourselves. If we are truly honest with ourselves, we let ourselves start taking slander, gossip, and just rude behavior to heart when we would usually tell others not to pay attention to that type of talk. We tend to give that person and the things they say so much power that it begins to affect us emotionally, physically, and spiritually.
As Ed Young said, the real f-word (forgiveness) is more for us than for the person we are forgiving.
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One of the new features we are implementing in this article is to take article ideas from the readers. This would be a great way for readers to get questions about general topics answered by a professional. We will do our best to cover every topic throughout the year. You can submit your topic ideas by email , counselorbrandon1@gmail.com, or send them in writing to Faith in the Family, 200 South Trenton Street, Ruston, LA, 71270. For more specific individual topics, please take a risk and call for an appointment.
