It was the Spring of 1983, and baseball season was underway at Minden High School. We were coming off back-to-back state championships and had seven starters returning. Expectations were high. We were well-known through the State, the community was engaged, and the entire school expected nothing less than a third state championship. As we progressed through that senior year, like the other seniors on the team, I began to feel the pressure of meeting expectations and winning that third championship. To be a part of winning two state titles but lose in your senior year would be a major disappointment and a huge letdown for the entire community. In addition, I wanted to play college baseball, and I had yet to attract any attention from local colleges.
We won some close games in the state playoffs and eventually won the state championship. As the team celebrated on the field, I was more relieved than excited. It was finally over. We had accomplished what we were expected to achieve. In addition, while we had achieved our team goal, my goal of playing in college was still up in the air. I went ahead and enrolled at La Tech and continued to play summer ball trying to do whatever I could to get that opportunity.
During summer orientation, I made an appointment to meet with Coach Patterson at Tech about trying out as a walk-on player. Coach Patterson told me that I was welcome to tryout, but I would not make his team. He was only going to take a walk-on pitcher. I left there that day disappointed, but on the way home, it sunk in that my expectations would not be met. While a little sad, it was also an experience of freedom. I now was completely free from expectations that I could not meet nor impact on my own. For the first time in a long time, I was excited about going to the ballpark that night. I couldn’t wait to put that uniform on and experience every second of playing catch, batting practice, playing the game, being a great teammate, and playing as hard as I could possibly play. For the rest of that summer season, I had a great experience and played as well as I have ever played in my life. I was finally free to play relaxed and to enjoy every second of the experience.
Expectations can be beneficial when they are focused on helping individuals, organizations, or teams focus on core values, high character behavior, consistent performance, or desired levels of effort. Expectations are also helpful in communicating to team members and coordinating efforts between groups. However, expectations can be harmful when they are based totally on results and not the process involved in achieving the results. Expectations can be unrealistic, impractical, or just not achievable. Whether we are impacted by external expectations placed on us by others or excessive internal expectations we place on ourselves, we must be thoughtful about how we deal with those expectations.
Here are a few thoughts on how to set, manage, and respond to expectations from the various roles we may fill:
- Set expectations on what can be controlled and impacted. Focus on the behaviors, the effort, and the process. Be careful focusing on just results.
- As a manager or coach, inspect what you expect. Be clear and consistent with your team with the appropriate level of follow-up to ensure expectations are understood.
- Potential should be your guide. Expectations based on potential are healthy while those going beyond potential can be harmful. Understand potential!
- Expectations should raise performance and behavior levels, not hinder them.
- Every child, team, and work groups are unique. Don’t let comparison drive expectations.
Take some time this week and evaluate the expectations in your life. Consider the expectations you are dealing with personally and those that you are placing on others. Let’s be sure those expectations are bringing out the best in us and others and not hindering performance or fulfillment.
