There is obviously a great deal of excitement around Ruston High and the community with the start of the football season. With so much success the last few years and so much optimism entering this season, it’s easy for many to have very high expectations for the team. I recall a very similar situation entering my senior season in high school. We had won two state baseball championships in a row and had much of our team returning. Expectations were sky high!
There is a problem with those high expectations. Expectations are wants, wishes, desires, or thoughts on an outcome based on prior results. We don’t have full control over expectations. Variables come into play that impact the expectation. Unexpected challenges or obstacles can occur. Expectations can lead to stress, anxiety, and added pressure. Expectations can also lead to disappointment, discouragement, and even depression in some cases.
I have written about it, spoken on the subject, and counseled many on the topic many times. I strongly encourage all of us to raise our standards, not our expectations. Expectations are outcome based. Standards are input based. Expectations are not controllable, but standards are controllable. Standards are the norms that we operate within. Standards are the reflection of our identity. Standards represent the culture of a team or business.
While I would strongly encourage those within and close to the RHS football team/program to continue to elevate their standards, I would also encourage them not to put unnecessary expectations on themselves. I recall winning that third state championship and just being relieved we didn’t fail (let everyone down). That’s not a healthy approach. We don’t need to go through life trying not to fail.
The same message applies to all of us in every stage of life. While the standards for RHS football may include a strong commitment to offseason training, on-time attendance at all sessions, high energy level at all practices, exemplary leadership on the campus, maximum effort on every play, and a unified commitment to one another and team, you need standards in your life too.
So many of us get wrapped up in expectations. We expect certain things by defined stages of life. We compare ourselves to others or to some objective that we set for ourselves and evaluate success or failure based on that outcome or achievement. We fail to see that life is lived within pursuit not accomplishment. Healthy goals are input focused not outcome based. Whether we are talking about a business or personal focus, it’s key that we focus on controllable actions not wishful outcomes.
Invest some time considering the identity you want, the lifestyle you seek, and establish standards around what you value. You will find more joy in the process and more fulfillment from life. Outcomes will generally take care of themselves as you invest daily in becoming the person you want to become.
Who you are becoming is more important than what you are achieving. Raise those standards not those expectations!
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