by Malcolm Butler
Football has a little different meaning for Blake Robinson this year.
For that matter, life does too.
The Cedar Creek junior has always enjoyed competing on the gridiron for the Cougars, ever since he suited up in the green and gold in third grade. And he was already eager to represent the interlocked C’s.
But after a life-altering tragedy this past summer, Blake – and the entire Robinson family – has a different perspective, on a lot of things.
Two months ago, Blake’s older brother, Owen, was killed in a single vehicle wreck in the early morning hours of July 7 while traveling north on Louisiana 33. He was driving north from Ruston to Farmerville heading to his grandmother’s house.
It is something no parent, and in Blake’s case no sibling, should ever have to experience. The accident has left a void in little brother’s everyday life.
A void that he tries the impossible task of numbing these days with football, family, and friends.
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“In tough times we always turned to each other.”
Owen Robinson had just turned 20 years old in April.
The oldest son of Jeff Robinson and Brooke Preaus St. John, Owen had spent his elementary and high school days at Cedar Creek.
He played football for the Cougars and was an integral part in the boys powerlifting team winning the state title in 2021. Owen still holds the school record in the deadlift in the 165-pound weight class at 530 pounds.
Pretty strong.
But, according to those who knew hm, one of Owen’s biggest strengths was being a big brother to Blake. And according to little bro, he excelled at it.
“We were tight,” said Blake. “If I ever needed anything, I would text him. If he ever needed anything, he would text me. We would call just about every night and talk. I would text him every night to check on him.
“In tough times we always turned to each other. We have always been there for each other no matter what happened. We never judged. We would lock arms and go. That’s just how we would go.”
They were almost inseparable despite the four-year age difference.
“Typical brother relationship,” said Brody Soto, one of Owen’s best friends. “Love and hate. They would get into fights every now and then like brothers do, but I’ve never seen two brothers that were closer. They always had each other’s back. Blake was Owen’s best friend.”
“They were by far each other’s biggest fan, even bigger than probably us as parents,” said Jeff. “They fought hard and loved harder. They went through a lot together. They had a really neat brother relationship.”
The two brothers were on opposite ends of the spectrum in physical build. Owen stood 5-foot-7, 165 pounds and Blake measures 6-foot-3, 245 pounds.
However, they both possessed a competitive spirit and a love for athletics.
In 2022, they shared that love on the football field. It was Owen’s senior season while Blake was just a wet-behind-the-ears freshman for the Cougars.
Blake has wonderful memories from that time together.
“Around half of the ball game, we would be on the field at the same time,” said Blake. “It was surreal. Me always looking up to Owen, I never thought I would get that chance to be on the field with him. That just drove me to work harder to make sure I was on the field with him that year.”
It is a season and a memory that will be forever embedded in the minds and hearts of the Robinson clan.
“I will never forget 2022,” said Jeff. “Down in the north endzone someone blocked a punt and Blake jumped on it in the endzone for a touchdown. Owen came (sprinting) across the field, and he was the first one to Blake.
“He wasn’t nearly the closest one to him when (the play) happened, but he was the first one to him and they jumped up into the air (and collided). They did whatever the guys call it where they bump hips and cross their arms.
“In that moment Owen was happier for Blake to score that touchdown than Blake was about scoring it. He was excited for him.”
Par for the course for Owen. That one moment was just a microcosm of his personality when it came to his family and friends.
“Owen was everybody’s best cheerleader,” said Brooke. “He would come home and say, ‘Mom, so and so did this. Can you believe it?’ Somebody being better than him at something didn’t matter to him. They were doing their best, and he was happy for them.”
Although the two boys were similar in many ways, they also had their unique differences that maybe only a mother truly understands.
“When they were babies, I would sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to Owen and You are My Sunshine to Blake,” said a teary-eyed Brooke. “And it’s still the same thing. That’s how they were. Owen was the star of the show and the high maintenance child, and Blake was just the sunshine all the time.”
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“He was really my best friend. No one really gets losing a big brother until you do.”
Blake was sound asleep at his father’s house the morning of Sunday, July 7.
Like many teenage boys do, he was taking the opportunity to play catch up on the Z’s before getting up for church.
Little did he know the life he knew was about to change.
According to Blake, he reached out to his brother that night before the morning of the wreck.
“I texted him the night before, and he didn’t text me back,” said Blake, who recently turned 16 years old. “It was weird. About 4 a.m. he finally texted me back and said, ‘It’s okay’ or something like that. It was weird.”
It would be the last time the two would communicate.
The state troopers came to Jeff’s house around 8 a.m. to relay the news. Brooke was driving in from Warren, Arkansas, with her husband John after visiting family over the weekend.
“It was the longest drive ever,” said Brooke.
Blake’s parents decided to let him sleep until Brooke could arrive at the residence to help deliver the news.
“It was a long two hours,” said Jeff.
Once Brooke arrived, Jeff summoned Blake downstairs.
“I saw my dad and my stepdad there,” said Blake. “My mom is crying. I am only thinking the worst. And it was the worst.
“They said, ‘Owen passed away in a car wreck last night.’ I just went right back upstairs. I didn’t want it to be real. I still don’t. He was really my best friend. No one really gets losing a big brother until you do.”
“He was devastated,” said Jeff. “I remember Blake just saying, ‘He was my everything.’”
It did not take long for the news to spread throughout the Ruston community that morning. And as it did, the support for the Robinson family came rolling in.
“When we got home (the morning of Owen’s death), I had a garage full of Owen’s classmates and my friends and Blake’s friends,” said Brooke. “It was really amazing.”
According to Blake, one of the first people to come to see him that day was Cedar Creek head coach William Parkerson.
“What William Parkerson did for us …,” said Jeff. “When we lost Owen, he did the best coaching job that he will ever do without any preparation. He stepped in and was a true coach to Blake through this tough time. He wrapped his arms around him.
“He did things he didn’t have to do. He did things you can’t be trained to do. What he did was he showed us his heart.”
According to Jeff, Parkerson and Jacob Angevine and many of the Cougars coaches have helped Blake through the past two months, especially when he is at school.
“(Coach Parkerson) stamped his way into our hearts,” said Jeff. “Blake has two years left at Cedar Creek and if they don’t win one more game, you won’t hear a word from me because that guy showed up when it mattered.”
These gestures were not lost on Blake.
“Coach Angevine and Coach Parkerson have been close to me,” said Blake. “They were the first two to text me when they found out. Coach Parkerson even came to my house.”
Anyone who knows Parkerson, knows he is a man of few words. But at that moment, he was there for his star player.
“I implored our coaches to wrap their arms around Blake,” said Parkerson. “We probably won’t see the same version of Blake that we saw before that day. We just want to wrap our arms around him through all of this.”
Mama Robinson said she also has her own village watching out for Blake.
“Cedar Creek is family,” said Brooke. “We have friends there. His stepmother is there. Most of the teachers are my friends. Most of the teachers are Owen’s classmates’ mothers. And they are watching. And I have told them to watch.
“If they see something going wrong with my baby, they will let me know. I think you realize what your school means when something like this happens.”
Almost two full months have gone by since his brother’s passing, and Blake said he is still trying to adjust to life without Owen.
“I still text him,” said Blake. “Just because. I’m hoping he may answer but knowing he won’t. If I can tell him something that I want to share with him, it still gives me a little bit of comfort.”
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“I had one big brother. Now I have 10 or 12.”
Unfortunately, this is not the first time that Jeff Robinson has dealt with a close family loss.
Fifteen years ago, Jeff lost his little brother, Andy, to a rare autoimmune disease called Goodpasture’s Syndrome.
That was in 2009. Andy was 29. Jeff was 31.
Jeff said the loss of his brother sent him into a tailspin.
“It took me to a deep, dark place,” said Jeff very candidly. “For the next four years I struggled with my life. I held everything in and didn’t talk about it. I just internalized everything and tried to suppress it. I didn’t lean on family or friends. I didn’t ask for help, and it liked to kill me. I self-destructed during that time.”
Fortunately for Jeff, he was able to overcome this tough time in his life. And now he is using his own experiences to help with his son.
“Blake is my No.1 priority,” said Jeff. “He is what my eyes are focused on, making sure he is okay. I am literally doing the opposite with Blake (of what I did with Andy). If I can remember how I handled something with the loss of Andy, I just do the opposite with Blake. What I did simply didn’t work. What I did was terrible. I didn’t do anything right.
“I guess that was God’s little way of teaching me … almost killing me … but teaching me 15 years ago what not to do.”
Blake will readily admit that his tendency is to also internalize things.
“When I found out, I just shut down,” said Blake. “I’m really not an emotional person. I just don’t like showing emotions. Once I heard the story, it just really sucked.”
The good news is Blake has an army on his side from family to friends to coaches to even strangers.
He said some of Owen’s best friends have stepped in since the accident, and he admits it has been a tremendous help.
“Owen had so many good friends,” said Blake. “You could see that at the visitation and funeral. I have relied on his friends, and they have stepped up as big brothers.
“No one really got Owen (like) his friends and me. I had one big brother. Now I have 10 or 12.”
Austin Webb was part of the same graduating class at Cedar Creek as Owen. They played football together and competed on the school’s powerlifting team together.
“It’s made us all realize how important everyone is to each other and how we can’t take things for granted,” said Webb. “Blake has a lot of Owen in him. It’s one reason we really like to hang out with him.”
Webb said spending more time with Blake has been therapeutic for him and so many of Owen’s friends.
“None of us are the same since this happened, but we like to hang out with Blake because we know he is hurting more than anybody else,” said Webb. “It helps us, and I know it helps him. We still get to see a part of Owen every day.”
“That’s what a number of his buddies have said,” said Blake. “They say ‘We love hanging out with you because it shows us, he is still with us.’ There’s always going to be part of him in me. That’s what they are seeing.”
Soto is one of those buddies.
“I see a lot of Owen in Blake,” said Soto. “They are so much alike in so many ways.
“We have been trying to keep Blake busy and keep him around us in case something does happen. If all these emotions catch up to him, he knows he has someone to talk to about it. We let him know he has people to fall back on when he needs it.”
Brooke said she will be forever grateful for the caring actions of these young men during this time in her baby boy’s life.
“I had two kids who were always going to have each other, and now he is by himself,” said Brooke. “Those boys stepping up means everything because now he knows if he needs to talk about something, he can go to those boys.
“I want Blake to realize that friendship is reciprocal. You get out of it what you put into it. Friends are sometimes more important than (even family) depending on what is going on with you.”
Brooke said Blake has shown interest in joining some of Owen’s friends in a group counseling session as they all try to navigate through unchartered waters.
It is a game plan that should benefit all of them.
“We men are made out in a way that we act tough and don’t like to show our true emotions,” said Webb. “We are trying to help Blake understand that he must be able to let it out. We know he is hurting. We are all hurting.”
Brooke recently purchased 25 Yappy bracelets for Blake and many of Owen’s friends to remind them to rely on their faith in this tough time.
“You scan (the bracelet) every day with your phone, and it shows a different bible verse,” said Brooke. “I want him to see it every day because God is on time. I want him to see the verses because I don’t want his faith to change. I want him to know there is a plan. There is a reason. We may not understand it on this Earthly side, but we will. If we can keep going, we can grieve with faith.
“We can be sad, and we can still miss him, but because we know where he is, we are going to be okay. I don’t want Blake’s faith to be hindered by this.”
Jeff and Blake are both wearing chains with crosses that contain Owen’s name. They also plan to get tattoos together in memory of Owen.
“He and Owen had been begging for tattoos,” said Jeff. “Blake asked the other day, ‘You going to let me get a tattoo now?’ I said, “Sure. A tattoo ain’t never hurt nobody.’”
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“I want to make him proud and football gives me that opportunity.”
Blake was already going to be one of the keys for the Cougars football team this year.
After earning multiple awards on the gridiron as a sophomore last season, the impressively built linebacker is a year older and stronger.
And he should be a force to be reckoned with on Friday nights.
“He is big, and he is pretty physical, and he has good instincts,” said Parkerson. “He has definitely matured and is much more consistent in his practice habits and what he does in his everyday life.”
However, after the tragedy of this past summer, not only is Blake bigger and stronger and faster … but he is also much more motivated.
“I’m playing with a whole different mindset this year,” said Blake. “I know (Owen) would want to be out there and see me go crazy. I know he would want to see me make every play. Make every tackle. I’m going to be a whole different player.”
If his jamboree performance against Ouachita Christian last Friday was any indication, Blake is a young man of his word.
In just two 12-minute quarters against the Eagles, Blake recorded five tackles, one sack, and two pass breakups.
Expect to see No. 8 all over the field.
“I think we are going to get the best possible version of Blake moving forward,” said Parkerson.
The football field will serve as a sanctuary for Blake this year, a place where he can get away from everything for a few hours.
“There is no other way to describe it,” said Blake. “Honestly, since the passing of Owen, I have turned to football. That’s my first instinct. All of this is really hard to accept. So, football is an escape for me.”
The Cougars are honoring the memory of Owen by wearing a sticker on their helmets that contain the initials OR.
“The sticker on our helmet with Owen’s initials means a lot to me, to our family,” said Blake.
Jeff will have a sideline view to all of Blake’s ball games as he serves as the team’s official in-game statistician. He stands alongside the Cougar sideline, just like he did when Owen suited up.
Brooke will watch from the stands, but she said she will not be hard to find.
“I just plan to be his biggest cheerleader all season long and all life long,” said Brooke. “I told him, I am going to be pretty obnoxious because he is all I have now. I will be an even more obscene cheerleader than I have ever been.”
Mama will be the one wearing the ‘Be Great Number 8’ glitter T-shirt and making plenty of noise.
And while she wants Blake to have a great season on the football field, her desire for her son goes beyond just one sport.
“This year more than anything I want him to be driven by what has happened, not be defined by it,” said Brooke. “I want him to do better in school. I want him to study harder. I want him to play harder. I want him to lift heavier. I want him to be a better friend. I want him to emulate the best parts of Owen …”
Jeff agrees.
“I can see Blake trying to emulate his brother in heart and as a good teammate,” said Jeff.
This season as No. 8 runs out to the field on Friday nights, he will not only be playing for his school but also for the memory of his big brother.
“I am just excited for us to come together as a (football) family and go to war every day, and just show what we can do on Friday nights,” said Blake. “It sucks that (Owen) is gone … I want to make him proud and football gives me that opportunity.”
