College football season has officially started and fan bases all over the country are upset. What started as hopeful optimism has now transformed into full blown panic for some. That’s right, half the teams that play games each weekend still lose.
While we are just one full week into the season, expectations are in danger of not being met. Those expectations range from beating rivals to winning championships. Some may even expect perfect seasons.
The problem with expectations is that they are nothing more than a wish, a want, or a dream. We don’t have control over the outcomes, but we sure believe strongly that our version of the outcome should happen.
Expectations often come across as very burdensome, divisive, and one-sided. While providing clarity to a matter, they can also alienate and raise tension levels. Expectations are often the unstable foundation for disappointment.
Unmet expectations can pose real problems. The disappointment can lead to excessive anger, bitterness, or rage (sounds like a college football fanbase). Falling short of other’s expectations can lead to a decline in self-worth, a struggle with self-esteem, or diminished self-confidence.
Unmet expectations can lead to strained relationships, poor communication, and untimely firing. They can dominate conversations, destroy unity, and ruin plans. Unmet expectations can be a strain on individuals, organizations, and families.
I am not a big supporter of expectations. Expectations are outcome focused and quite frankly, we don’t control outcomes. I would prefer to focus on inputs, not outcomes.
Try raising your standards, not your expectations!
Standards are the inputs that drive our lives. Standards are the inputs that drive our workplaces. Standards are also the inputs that drive your favorite college football team.
Unlike expectations, we control the inputs. Where expectations are just wishes, wants, and desires, standards are the habits we develop, the systems we commit to, and the values we hold tight.
Colossians 3:23 tells us to work heartily (input focused) for God and not for man’s approval (outcome-based expectation). Standards enable us to maintain a healthy view of excellence without being overly consumed with an outcome that could disappoint us or others. The key is letting go of what we don’t control and focusing on habits that we can control.
So many of us struggle with anxiety, worry, and stress. Much of that struggle relates to expectations regarding issues that we don’t control.
Letting go of expectations doesn’t mean we don’t dream, plan, or have visions for the future. It merely means we focus on living today with standards that will drive us toward those dreams or plans. There are no guarantees, but the focus is the process of living, not the destination of the dream. Direction, not desire, determines destination.
If your team didn’t meet your expectations this past week, maybe it’s time. Just maybe drop the expectations and enjoy the game.
More importantly, start living a standard-focused life rather than riding the emotion of a life full of expectations.
Doug provides professional speaking and coaching services to organizations and individuals. Whether you are looking for a speaker for your next event or a leadership coach to develop people and build a team culture, feel free to reach out to Doug at doug.strickel@gmail.com and learn more about PLUS.
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